A Divorced Dad's Playbook for the Still-Married: Hard-won secrets so you can be a better partner, parent & person

"I've played a lot of dads on TV. I wonder what kind of dad I'd have been if I'd had this playbook."
Richard Kind, Tony-nominated actor (Spin City, Curb Your Enthusiasm, and the voice of Bing Bong in Inside Out)

What readers are saying: "Playbooks are boring. This book is not boring." "Funnier than expected." "Hilarious, self-deprecating honesty." "I have been married for 54 years, and it was an eye-opener for me too."

Your marriage is probably fine. That's not a compliment.

Pickups, bills, what's for dinner, who's handling Thursday. You just can't remember the last time you talked about anything else.

So why take marriage advice from someone who got divorced? Because I wound up happier than I'd been in years, using skills that arrived one marriage too late. You can have them without the divorce.

My marriage ended in the second of three couples counseling sessions, two weeks before I turned 50. A three-session money-back guarantee on 15 years of marriage is its own answer. Within a minute of walking out I'd called dibs on the therapist and started dividing the assets, before I'd even registered it was over.

That's a foundation problem. Most marriages don't have one. They have a skills problem, and skills are fixable. This isn't a divorce book or a should-I-leave book. It's what I wish someone had told me while I was still married.

Over 13 chapters, here's what I learned the hard way:
Why losing half my time with my kids made me a better father than having all of it ever did.
Why I stopped waiting to have my mind read.
Why I learned to run the whole household instead of "babysitting" my own children.
Why I put every dollar on a shared spreadsheet.
Why I didn't recognize myself in my own camera roll.
Why I bought a new wardrobe for strangers I hadn't met, after years of not bothering for the woman I married.

None of it requires a divorce. That's the entire point.

Every chapter ends with one line worth remembering and a short list of things to Start, Stop and Keep doing. No lectures. It's funny where it can be, honest where it has to be, and the joke is always on me, never on the marriage.

"If you're wondering if your marriage needs this book, it does. David Levin could have written a memoir for himself. Instead, he wrote this book for you."
Matt Carmichael, photographer and author of Meeting my Heroes: Life Lessons from Icons, Creatives, and Everyday Legends

"The book I wish my clients had read two years before they called me."
Justin Milrad, CDC Certified Divorce Coach

If you're still married, you're holding an unfair advantage. Use it.